The Night Before Chinmas

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The Night Before Chinmas

Post by Gravehunterzero on Fri Dec 25, 2009 2:09 am

T'was the Night before Chinmas and all through the Cabin
Not a deadite was sturring not even Candarian demons
The Shotgun shells were hung by the chimney with care
In hopes that Bruce Campbell soon be there
The boomstick was snug in it's rack
with visions of sugar babies danced in its head
And Moose on his mount me on the chair
Had just settled down for a very strange night
When out on the lawn I heard such a clatter
Away to the gun rack I flew with a flash
Tore open the chamber to load it up fast
The moon abreast to the haunted forest
Gave the movement of trees, looking for rape
When, what to my wondering eyes should appear,
A 1970 Olds and a propeller was there!
With a badass looking driver so lively and quick
I knew in a moment it must be The Chin
As fast as eagles the trees came clear
But Bruce rent them asunder
Before they could grope, fondle or sneer.
As I went to see if my asstiance mattered
The door burst forth with a great clatter
As Bruce walked through the doorway he splintered
He was dressed as a store clerk
S-Mart if it mattered
His face covered in saw dust and blood
Make him look like a disgrunteled carpenter that had too much sun
His broad chin and his rock hard tummy
That shook when he laughed like concrete in a quake
I gasped when I saw him in spite of myself
With a wink of his eye and a sneer on his lips
Soon gave me to know nothing to dread
He spoke not a word and went straight to the shed
Gathering spare parts and a new chain for his saw
And giving a nod to the woods he did go
He went to his car and opened a book before dismissal
And away he went like a time traveling missile
But I heard him exclaim as he drove out of the way
AND THIS TIME GODDAMMIT I'LL GET THOSE WORDS RIGHT!

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Re: The Night Before Chinmas

Post by MrNatas on Fri Dec 25, 2009 4:04 am

Thats fucking amazing Grave, there needs to be more of this.

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Re: The Night Before Chinmas

Post by Sir Ketchup Chippington X on Fri Dec 25, 2009 4:16 pm

Yesssssssssssssss

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Re: The Night Before Chinmas

Post by insomniac on Sat Dec 26, 2009 12:02 pm

A beautiful tale about what the holiday is really about. Bruce Campbell.

_________________

Williams 4:20 (New Chinstament): Hail to thy king baby.

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Re: The Night Before Chinmas

Post by Gravehunterzero on Sat Dec 26, 2009 1:23 pm

insomniac wrote:A beautiful tale about what the holiday is really about. Bruce Campbell.
And kicking ass.

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